S.O.S. I am in MAJOR distress...help!

I haven't posted anything in so long. I've also...deep breath...feeling of wanting to vomit...gained 10 pounds back. 10. TEN. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9...10! I'm so embarrassed. I feel defeated. I need help. Like always, it happened slowly, creeping up like a cold. First, you get that scratchy throat and just a few sniffles so you take some DayQuil and think to yourself "hmm, I don't feel super, oh well, it'll be fine." and it usually is fine...until the medicine runs out...then a few days later...BAM you feel like shit and remember back when it all started. Crap. Shit. Dammit. Son of a Bitch. Yes, all bad words. But that's how I feel. 

It all started when I was at the top of my game...eating SO well, working out every single day...then one day I got a little cold and decided to take it easy so I could feel better. I liked it. A lot. Going straight home after work, immediately getting in my sweat pants, having some comfort food, watching some television...aaahhhhh. Heaven. 

THEN IT ALL CAME CRASHING DOWN. 

It was a slippery slope...slippery and smooth. And down I went with my arms waving around in the air, happy as could be...eating, sleeping, lounging. 

So people, here I am, about 3 1/2 months and 10 ugly pounds later. I would still weigh myself once a week and when my weight went up 3, 4, 5, even 6 pounds I thought "no biggie, I've still got total control over this." WRONG. Pizza, McDonald's, Fried Everything, you name it, I ate it, or have been eating it rather. Christmas and Thanksgiving happened. I am so disappointed in myself. My pants aren't necessarily tight...yet, but I can tell that's the direction we're going in. And I can't go back there again. I just can't do it. I don't have the emotional strength and energy to gain and lose 65 pounds again. 10 doesn't seem like a lot in the grand scheme of things, but good God, it's the gateway number. 

So here I am, confessing my deep, dark secret about gaining 10 pounds in the last 3 1/2 months. I did this to myself and I am the only one that can undo it. It's going to be hard. But I can do it, right? Please encourage me. I can't even explain how down and out this has me. I caught myself looking in the mirror and wanting to cry. It's so unhealthy, I know, but I could critique myself for hours and I hate it. It's exhausting. 

I will post less depressing things another day. Please help keep me motivated. I really need it.

P.S. I ate a doughnut this morning. And an egg and cheese biscuit. Oops. 

Recent Photos:

 At Christmas with precious baby Eli...check out that double chin on the side of my face. Gross.

 My angels, Lola and Bluebird.

 Date night...not looking too shabby, but it's my hip/thigh region that's disgusting.

 We're building a house! Yay! This is our lot.

This is the brick and stone that our house is being built with.